About Debra L. Rubin, Esq.

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So far Debra L. Rubin, Esq. has created 23 blog entries.

Five Things That You Should Know About Divorce

There are many surprises along the way when a couple decides to get divorced, but there are also five very important things you should know about getting a divorce so that you are prepared. 1. Don’t Expect to Win Your Divorce Case In a divorce there are no winners.  It may be a hard pill to swallow, but the truth is it is extremely rare for either side to get exactly what they want in a divorce, whether its settled or decided by a Judge.  Before you decide to engage in a full-blown litigation, keep this in mind. 2. Carefully Think Through Any Important Decisions In your divorce you will be faced with life changing [...]

By |2022-01-04T09:57:15-05:00January 4, 2022|Divorce Blog Posts|

When COVID Complicates A Divorce, What Do You Do?

COVID is now part of our daily lives – from what we hear, to what we see, to what we do.  For some families going through the divorce process COVID has become an added source of tension. Arguments about which COVID precautions should be implemented for a child and to what degree, along with whether to have a child vaccinated, have become major sticking points for some couples going through a divorce.   How do families go about resolving these issues? When there is a disagreement about whether to vaccinate a child, a child’s pediatrician can offer valuable guidance.  They can guide parents as to what is best for a child based upon that child’s individual [...]

By |2021-09-28T15:40:43-04:00September 28, 2021|Divorce Blog Posts|

Packing Your Emotions for Your First Summer Vacation as A Divorced Parent

By Debra L. Rubin The kids are out of school and summer is here, but if this is your first summer as a divorced family, navigating vacations can be tricky. Whenever possible, it is best to approach any situation between you and your ex with an open line of communication and a mutual respect for each other’s time with your children. If you are taking the kids on a vacation, you should provide your ex with your itinerary, including dates of travel, and hotel and airline information.  If your ex is taking the kids on a vacation, you should expect the same information as well. Be mindful of what you say and how you act [...]

By |2021-06-30T16:50:13-04:00June 30, 2021|Divorce Blog Posts|

When Is the Right Time to Bring Your Significant Other Home to Your Kids?

By Debra L. Rubin Your marriage is over, your divorce is almost finalized, but your social life has moved on and now there is someone new in your life.  Great for you, but a reason to exercise caution around your children. So, when is the right time to introduce a significant other to your children?  There is no exact moment that you can put on a calendar, or a magical number of days you should wait; there are however, some best practices when approaching the situation. If you are romantically involved with a person, and your divorce is not finalized, it is a good idea to keep that romantic relationship out of sight from your [...]

By |2021-04-20T11:23:35-04:00April 20, 2021|Divorce Blog Posts|

Divorce – What are the Key Issues?

Whether your divorce is simple or complicated, amicable, or contentious – there are four key issues that generally must be addressed. The Children – This is likely one of the most emotionally complicated aspects of a divorce. Custody and parenting time are not as simple as dividing up the week. Parents must consider things such who holds the decision-making authority for the children. Do both parents have to agree on everything?  Does one parent have the decision-making authority?  Or does one parent make the final decision in some areas (for example medical), while the other parent makes the final decision in other areas (for example education)?  It also must be determined where the children live.   [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00February 18, 2021|Divorce Blog Posts|

Co-Parenting in the Age of COVID

Co-parenting in the most amicable of divorces poses challenges; now consider parents who don’t see eye-to-eye on essential aspects of their child(ren)s lives, and the challenges become harder to overcome. Today, our country stands divided on whether to get the COVID-19 vaccine once it becomes widely available and likewise, parents stand divided on whether or not their children should be vaccinated.  So, what do you do if you and your ex or soon-to-be-ex can’t agree upon certain major aspects of raising and parenting your children? When a couple gets divorced, their child custody arrangements typically include provisions directing things such as residential custody and decision-making authority.  Sometimes the decisions are easy, and sometimes they are [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00December 17, 2020|Divorce Blog Posts|

The Checklist – What to Do When You Are Preparing for A Divorce

After much consideration, you have decided it is time to end your marriage.  The next steps may seem easy – hire an attorney to handle everything – but that’s not the case.  In fact, preparing for your divorce may take as much time and energy as you put into trying to save your marriage. FINANCIAL DOCUMENTS You will need to gather your tax returns, W2s, bank statements, and retirement account statements. These documents are a critical part of determining your financial future.  Your income, savings, and investments will all be significant when determining spousal and child support and the division of assets. Do you have life insurance, disability insurance, long-term care insurance, or health insurance [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00September 15, 2020|Divorce Blog Posts|

Adjusting Financial Support During COVID

During a time when we all need financial support to get through this COVID pandemic, some families find themselves dealing with how to handle their child and spousal support issues as the economic impact of COVID takes its toll.  If you have support arrangements with your ex, or soon-to-be ex, and the spouse paying support is financially impacted by COVID (due to a job loss or business shutdown), it is best to try to make an effort to work things out amicably.    Not only will this help accommodate one another, but it will also prevent more tension for your family during what is already challenging time.  If working things out amongst one another is not an option (perhaps because it is perceived that one spouse is using the pandemic as an excuse to [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00June 30, 2020|Divorce Blog Posts|

Domestic Violence – A Problem Among A Pandemic

COVID-19 is causing physical, mental, and emotional stress for all of us.  Now imagine being the victim of domestic violence in your marriage.  Under normal circumstances being in close quarters, dealing with added financial strains, the constant barrage of information from the news and social media, and resorting to increased eating and drinking is a recipe for a very stressful situation.   Dealing with all of these factors as a victim of domestic violence will exacerbate an already volatile situation. Emotionally, victims of domestic violence may feel they have no place to go, now physically they don’t either. Where before they may have had an option to attend a therapy session or go see a friend [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00April 4, 2020|Divorce Blog Posts|

You Can’t Do This Alone

Going through a divorce, a separation, a child custody case – whatever the situation may be – you need an advocate; someone on your side who can help you navigate the ins and outs of the law, the courtroom or mediation process, and someone who knows and understands your rights and what you are entitled to. “It takes a village.” Yes, it does, for every aspect of your life, including when you are fighting for your children, your home, and your future. The knowledge and practical experience that a qualified lawyer has cannot be obtained online.  You can do Google searches and you can get “advice” from social media groups where people have been in [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00January 31, 2020|Divorce Blog Posts|

Why You Need to Divorce Social Media While You Are Getting A Divorce

Remember growing up and being told “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”? While the days of talking face-to-face have been replaced with technology, the same rules apply to social media – especially if you are going through a divorce or separation. Some people feel the need to display their whole life on social media, whether it’s a Facebook post or an Instagram selfie.  Posting the wrong thing, however, could be a costly mistake. Your social media posts can be used against you in your divorce proceeding.  For example, posting pictures of yourself with another man or woman with whom you are romantically involved will, not only inflame the [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00November 8, 2019|Divorce Blog Posts|

Getting Your Spouse Out of The House – It’s Not as Easy as Closing the Door

Just because you are getting separated or going through a divorce, doesn’t mean one spouse has the right to kick another out of the house. Just like any part of the end of a marriage – literally closing the door on someone comes with guidelines, laws, and should be done respectfully for all parties involved. As a general rule just because you are fighting, having money issues, or have caught your spouse cheating, does not mean you are entitled to force them out of the house. However, if you, or your spouse, have voluntarily left the home or residence that you reside in then, a court can order that the spouse who stayed in the [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:41:09-04:00August 24, 2019|Divorce Blog Posts|

Sharing the Summer

  Just because the seasons are changing, doesn’t mean that the ease of a custody agreement needs to melt away under the hot summer sun. Sharing the summer with your ex or soon-to-be ex, so that it is almost seamless for your kids, can really be quite easy.  Like most other elements of your divorce and custody agreement, make sure that you take into consideration vacation schedules. It is common for parents to have a specified amount of uninterrupted vacation time. Usually parents will alternate years when selecting vacation times – if Mom has first choice of vacation time the first year, Dad will have first choice the second year. To avoid conflicts, upset children, [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:49:37-04:00July 12, 2019|Child Custody|

How to Effectively Co-Parent During Divorce

Co-parenting is a skill, and like any skill, it can always be improved upon. One of the most common areas that divorced or divorcing parties can improve is with respect to communication. In regards to communication about children, parents should exchange all important information. For example, if someone is sick or injured; if there is a school project that needs to be done; or if a child is upset about something. When in Doubt, It Is Better to Share Information Sometimes there is an issue of how you are going to communicate with your spouse. It can often be difficult for people to verbally communicate with each other during the divorce process. While verbal communication [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:39:34-04:00May 8, 2019|Co Parenting|

Pets as Property: A Change of Viewpoint in the Courts

Historically, the courts have treated pets as chattel or property. While families have an obvious emotional connection to their pets, the law views them as personal property, similar to a piece of furniture. As a result, many courts will distribute the property (pet) to one party or another. In extreme cases when an agreement cannot be reached, the court will direct that the pet be sold and the money divided between parties. The Future of Pets in Divorce Recent cases indicate that the treatment of pets in divorce cases is shifting, and the courts have started to look at the issue differently. In a relatively recent case, a Manhattan judge determined that the family dog [...]

By |2021-03-16T18:39:34-04:00October 2, 2018|Family Court|
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