Divorce Blog Posts

On March 31, Governor Andrew Cuomo signed legislation (S.854-A/A.128-A) legalizing recreational marijuana use in New York State.  It is now legal for adults 21 years and older to smoke, ingest or consume cannabis products, or give them to other people of the same legal age, with certain restrictions on quantities.  The bill also allows for up to five pounds of cannabis to be stored in a home if it is securely stored away from children. The legalization of marijuana comes with strict guidelines, just as the sale and use of tobacco and alcohol. The use of recreational marijuana, when around children, should be treated with the same regard as alcohol and cigarettes. Parents must use appropriate judgment [...]

Getting a divorce is not easy for anyone, especially children. Parents sometimes tend to get wrapped up in their own emotions as they work through the divorce process and neglect how their children are feeling. The stress of a divorce will impact each child differently depending on their family situation, their age, and their personality - but in the end, parents need to remember that they are adults and need to act appropriately around their children. Even though you and your spouse are going your separate ways, you need to maintain a united front to help your children through this difficult time. Children should not be punished for decisions that you and/or your spouse [...]

Getting a divorce isn’t as simple as two people saying “our marriage is over”.  There are multiple layers to a divorce, many of which most people don’t consider or understand. So, what do you need to know as you plan to end your marriage? Locate your assets and what will be divided. Get all of your financial documents in order. Find the deed to your home. Create a list of all shared debt and credit cards. Determine your custody goals. Be prepared for things to take time, divorce proceedings could take months depending on the situation. While this all may seem overwhelming, that is what we are here for.  We will help you navigate everything [...]

Whether your divorce is simple or complicated, amicable, or contentious – there are four key issues that generally must be addressed. The Children – This is likely one of the most emotionally complicated aspects of a divorce. Custody and parenting time are not as simple as dividing up the week. Parents must consider things such who holds the decision-making authority for the children. Do both parents have to agree on everything?  Does one parent have the decision-making authority?  Or does one parent make the final decision in some areas (for example medical), while the other parent makes the final decision in other areas (for example education)?  It also must be determined where the children live.   [...]

Co-parenting in the most amicable of divorces poses challenges; now consider parents who don’t see eye-to-eye on essential aspects of their child(ren)s lives, and the challenges become harder to overcome. Today, our country stands divided on whether to get the COVID-19 vaccine once it becomes widely available and likewise, parents stand divided on whether or not their children should be vaccinated.  So, what do you do if you and your ex or soon-to-be-ex can’t agree upon certain major aspects of raising and parenting your children? When a couple gets divorced, their child custody arrangements typically include provisions directing things such as residential custody and decision-making authority.  Sometimes the decisions are easy, and sometimes they are [...]

When the ball dropped on New Year’s Eve, none of us could have imagined the world we were about to be thrown into just a mere two months later.  In the beginning, no one knew how to handle working from home with children. This was the unimaginable. The unthinkable. At the same time, if you work on the front lines, then you have to be conscious about being around your children, and other loved ones, even your ex or soon to be ex-spouse. As all of us are adapting to the new “norm,” we need to open minded and respectful, more than ever, of each other. Think outside of the box. Not what would otherwise [...]

  Divorce, it can be devastating for a family.  Battling it out in court can make things even more difficult. Sometimes there is no option but to litigate, however, for others mediation may be an option. Mediation takes two. It’s voluntary, and it only works if both sides are willing to participate.  Each party must go in with realistic expectations regarding things such as custody, visitation, property division, living arrangements, and other financial obligations.  Mediation is guided by the two parties and their specific needs and can allow them to reach settlements that would otherwise not be attainable in court. Mediation could take an hour, or it could take a month or longer depending on [...]

After much consideration, you have decided it is time to end your marriage.  The next steps may seem easy – hire an attorney to handle everything – but that’s not the case.  In fact, preparing for your divorce may take as much time and energy as you put into trying to save your marriage. FINANCIAL DOCUMENTS You will need to gather your tax returns, W2s, bank statements, and retirement account statements. These documents are a critical part of determining your financial future.  Your income, savings, and investments will all be significant when determining spousal and child support and the division of assets. Do you have life insurance, disability insurance, long-term care insurance, or health insurance [...]

Divorce, for many, is the easy way out of a marriage that is in despair.  Sometimes couples are so wrapped up in the heat of the moment that they can’t see possible opportunities that may help address underlying issues and prevent them from filing for a divorce. Therapy and marriage counseling is a great place to start to work through any issues you may be experiencing. You’ll be engaging a third party, in a neutral space and be able to discuss freely and without judgment what’s going on in your lives. But this has to be a joint effort.  If both spouses aren’t willing to try this approach – whether it be individual therapy or [...]

During a time when we all need financial support to get through this COVID pandemic, some families find themselves dealing with how to handle their child and spousal support issues as the economic impact of COVID takes its toll.  If you have support arrangements with your ex, or soon-to-be ex, and the spouse paying support is financially impacted by COVID (due to a job loss or business shutdown), it is best to try to make an effort to work things out amicably.    Not only will this help accommodate one another, but it will also prevent more tension for your family during what is already challenging time.  If working things out amongst one another is not an option (perhaps because it is perceived that one spouse is using the pandemic as an excuse to [...]

For nearly three months most of us have been confined to our homes. Learning the new rules of social distancing, wearing a mask, and engaging in virtual everything.  For some, these were just new ways of life to get used to; but for others, this virus took on a whole new life of co-parenting and sharing custody. If you or your ex are in a position where exposure is possible, then making sure you aren’t putting your children at risk is a conversation you need to have. Rather than escalate an already stressful situation, be amicable and come up with ways to keep your custody agreement intact while protecting the health and safety of everyone [...]

COVID-19 is causing physical, mental, and emotional stress for all of us.  Now imagine being the victim of domestic violence in your marriage.  Under normal circumstances being in close quarters, dealing with added financial strains, the constant barrage of information from the news and social media, and resorting to increased eating and drinking is a recipe for a very stressful situation.   Dealing with all of these factors as a victim of domestic violence will exacerbate an already volatile situation. Emotionally, victims of domestic violence may feel they have no place to go, now physically they don’t either. Where before they may have had an option to attend a therapy session or go see a friend [...]

Your divorce papers are signed.  Your ex has moved out of the house. Your kids are preparing for their new norm of spending time with each of you.  While it may seem like this is officially the end of your marriage – there are actually a whole host of things you need to make sure you take care of – because it’s more than just signing on the dotted line. Once your divorce is finalized there are still other papers and legal matters that may need your attention. Life Insurance - how much do you have and who are the beneficiaries? The titles and insurance on your automobiles – whose name are they in? Do [...]

Going through a divorce, a separation, a child custody case – whatever the situation may be – you need an advocate; someone on your side who can help you navigate the ins and outs of the law, the courtroom or mediation process, and someone who knows and understands your rights and what you are entitled to. “It takes a village.” Yes, it does, for every aspect of your life, including when you are fighting for your children, your home, and your future. The knowledge and practical experience that a qualified lawyer has cannot be obtained online.  You can do Google searches and you can get “advice” from social media groups where people have been in [...]

December brings colder weather - some of us even welcome the snow - but don’t let your current family situation become bitter this holiday season.   Holidays can be stressful especially if you are going through, or are already divorced or separated, but, it’s this time of the year when putting your differences aside is the best gift you can give to your children. Before you push to have your children with you over the holidays and school recess stop and think about what is really feasible.  If you don’t have the time to take off from work then consider letting your ex take the kids over break.   Having them for the sake of having them [...]